Gauracandra dasa, Sri Bhadra devi dasi and Jahnava
Dear and respected Guru Maharaja,
Please accept our humble obeisances unto your divine lotus feet. All glories unto you! All glories to Srila Prabhupada!
Vyasa-puja is an occasion for celebration and an occasion for us to express the gratitude we feel towards our spiritual master. One of the pranama-mantras we learn early is,
om ajnana-timirandhasya jnananjana salakaya
caksur unmilitam yena tasmai sri gurave namah
“I offer my respectful obeisances unto my spiritual master, who has opened my eyes, which were blinded by the darkness of ignorance, with the torchlight of knowledge.”
For most part of our devotional life, we have chanted this mantra mechanically in a mood of apathy, active but lacking in emotion. During the 2021 Vyasa-puja, in one of your lectures, you described the deeper meaning of the mantra. You used this mantra to explain what awakening of a life of devotion to Srila Prabhupada is like – we are in the darkness of ignorance, compassionate Srila Prabhupada came with torchlight of knowledge, gratitude awakens, by that we get to a life of bhakti, and we should water the seed through the process of hearing and chanting. We are fortunate that we got access to compassionate Srila Prabhupada’s mercy through you. As we try to imbibe the mood of this mantra, we are realizing that a genuine mood of gratitude, gratitude based on love, is necessary to receive the fullness of the mercy that Srila Prabhupada is offering to us.
We have heard you narrate a very touching experience when, once, you were chanting and walking through some woods and you reached a point where you could see the skyline of the city. At that moment you realized what Srila Prabhupada had rescued you from, and you felt like doing something in return for Srila Prabhupada. Once in an answer to a question you told us that genuine gratitude finds a way of expressing itself. You have dedicated your life in service to Srila Prabhupada’s mission. You have washed pots, distributed books, been a temple commander, taken administrative responsibilities at the highest level, traveled across the world preaching, stayed in any type of accommodation that is offered, and given shelter to many devotees who are trying to move on the path of devotion. These are services we are aware of and then there are countless other services that we may not know.
In a conversation you once told us that you have an important administrative role in Srila Prabhupada’s movement and you are our spiritual master but you only see yourself engaged in service to Srila Prabhupada. We learn that an acarya teaches by example. In you, we see the perfection of the mood of gratitude and the principle of namah. Through your actions you perfectly illustrate the principle that devotional life is a life of gratitude. While there are so many services you take care of, you have always been fixed in chanting and hearing. During the many times you stayed with us and offered us an opportunity to render personal service to you, you always heard Srila Prabhupada’s lectures while honoring prasadam. For us it is another example of an acarya teaching by example the importance of hearing and chanting.
We have learned from your lectures the importance of alignment of body, mind, and heart towards Krsna. In the culture of the iceberg example, you stress on the heart being aligned to our values and behaviors. While it is easy to practice the behaviors of bhakti, it is much harder to know what in our heart drives the behaviors. In this regard Her Grace Krsna-Lila Mataji’s guidance has been invaluable for us. She is helping us look within our hearts and identify the false conceptions that drive our devotion and see the misalignment between our heart, values, and behaviors. Her guidance helps us see our current position in devotional service, and appropriate to our position, define a doable intention to realign ourself. It is because of her that today we are able to appreciate that devotional service is also a continuous process of refinement and realignment. It is stated in Caitanya-caritamrta, Madhya 24.125, that – “although there are many faults in this material world, there is one good opportunity — the association with devotees. Such association brings about great happiness”. The association of Krsna-Lila Mataji is a gift of your mercy.
We would also like to express our gratitude to devotees who are a part of our lives remotely. Taking their association on a regular basis every week keeps us connected to Srila Prabhupada’s books and also helps us apply the teachings of bhakti in our lives. Given our remote location, it is this association that keeps us enthusiastic. I (Gauracandra dasa) thank Leela Smarana Prabhu, Radha Vallabha Prabhu, Sundarananda Prabhu, and Ramananda Prabhu for giving me an opportunity to associate with them. We also take this opportunity to thank devotees in Naperville and Chicago, who have welcomed us with open hearts, given their association, and provided us with accommodation when we have desired to visit for retreats and events. Our gratitude also goes to His Grace Jagadananda Prabhu and His Grace Nityananda Pran Prabhu who have been supporting us in our devotional life.
I (Sri Bhadra devi dasi) would additionally like to share the following. In 2018 when I was struggling with my sadhana and health you asked me to look within and see why I am in this process. As I am still exploring to find an answer, I am realizing I have been peeling out layer after layer. It has been overwhelming but at the same time I feel content. I am very grateful to you for this mercy and resources that have come along to help me. I pray to seek your blessings at the dust of your lotus feet that these words emanating from your lotus mouth stay etched as guiding light in my heart forever.
It is described in Gopakumar’s pastime that his resolve weakened in Tapaloka but Gopakumar never stopped chanting. If he were to stop chanting, he would not discover the mantra’s full benefit, and for Gopakumar that would amount to ingratitude. Today we pray to you that we are able to awaken genuine gratitude in our hearts and stay fixed in devotional service.
Your servants,
Gauracandra dasa, Sri Bhadra devi dasi, Jahnava